Recently I was reflecting on my experience with the various churches I have attended.

I grew up in a small town attending a Baptist church. The Sunday school was largely staffed by men and women with limited education and mediocre teaching skills. They taught because they were devout Christians and believed that it was crucial to pass on the Christian faith to the next generation no matter what, demonstrating G.K. Chesterton’s assertion that “Anything worth doing is worth doing badly.” They taught me the Bible, but above all they taught me that following Jesus was the most important thing to do. We had a variety of pastors, but the pastor who was there during my crucial high school years taught clear biblical and theological principles that have remained with me. I had some profound spiritual experiences in that church that established my personal faith in Jesus and laid the foundation for my life. I gained a little experience presenting biblical meditations in the youth group.

When I went off to university, I found another, slightly larger Baptist church. Here I discovered deep expositional Bible preaching and teaching (careful examination of the meaning of a Bible passage and its application). This came from the pastor and the adult Sunday school class teacher and the college and career Sunday school class teacher. Many of the families in the church welcomed university students into their homes for Sunday dinner, which was a blessing in many ways. I made lifelong friends among the other students there. When I was asked to give a short testimony at a Sunday evening service, I described a spiritual renewal that had grown out of a year-long depression. This led me to being asked to take over teaching the college and career class. It was a great honor and a great challenge as I tried to meet the standard for expositional teaching that people in that church were used to.  

A couple of years after graduation, I moved across the country to work. My next-door neighbor and I went looking for a church and ended up at a small Baptist church, and about a year later I married her there. This church was very warm and welcoming. I didn’t contribute much there, we received much more than we gave, but we did start a small Bible study group.

After two-and-a-half years, we moved back east so I could pursue further studies. We joined a moderate-sized Mennonite Brethren church, founded a few years earlier by a group of dedicated laypeople. We were in a care group and made enduring friends there. A number of the founding members of the church invited us for dinner on occasion, and we sometimes hosted younger, unattached people. After I told a joke at an evening talent night at the church, the pastor asked me if I would preach. This was not unusual as up to a dozen lay members of the church preached there in addition to the pastor. I served on the church council and preached quite often, in that church and other churches. Preaching was the most fulfilling and also the most demanding work I have ever done, because it was a heavy responsibility and also required me to do serious soul-searching as I pondered how to first apply the Bible passage to my own life before declaring it to others.

After four years, I was hired as an editor with the Mennonite Brethren denominational magazine, and we moved to Manitoba in the center of Canada. For the first year, we attended a fairly large and traditional church, where we did not fit well. Most of the people our age went home for Sunday dinner with their parents, and we were not invited. We were part of a care group, and I preached, once, in an evening service.

The next year, we moved to a church plant meeting in a school. The congregation was mostly composed of middle-aged couples such as ourselves. There were no older couples to invite us younger families to dinner, but we had good fellowship with each other. We participated in care groups. This is probably where I was most active in church, serving as elder on the church council and preaching fairly often.

After six more years, my work transferred me back to the west coast. We again spent a year at a good church where we didn’t quite fit in, before settling into a large, multi-staff church near our home. This church’s strength was a vibrant adult Sunday school program, where most of the fellowship took place. We participated in care groups and made enduring friends. I taught occasionally in adult Sunday school and care groups. I still preached occasionally, but never in this church. Preaching is now often restricted to professional clergy. The church had vibrant children’s and youth ministries, which greatly benefited our children.

After about a dozen years, I found myself increasingly out of step with the direction of the church and the denomination. We left both, as well as my job. The next half-dozen years feel like a lost time. We attended a number of churches, three of them in particular, but never found a church where we felt we belonged.

We finally settled into a moderate-sized Alliance church. The strength of this church was a group of strong laypeople who had founded the church. This group, now in late middle age, scheduled a surprising range of fun social activities, from laser tag to mini-golf and bike riding. We participated in care groups but did not find many other places to serve. We made no enduring friends there. In time, the founding members moved on, and the congregation lost its identity and focus.

After a few years, we decided we were in need of a change and moved to another small city about twenty-five miles away. Here, we have been attending a moderate-sized Baptist church. It is a good church with sound doctrine, good preaching, and a clear vision. Although we are relatively healthy and active, we are old and are not expected to contribute much, although some of that might be our fault—we have not gotten around to officially joining. This is a friendly church, but we have a good number of acquaintances and only a few friends. We are leading a care group because we took the initiative to start one. If we left the church, I am not sure it would make much difference to the church. As with other churches in our recent experience, I do a lot of my ministry outside the church.