A friend. Don’t we all need one at times? Someone who will be there for us and love us despite all our prickly parts. So, where do we find them? Often when we become a Christian, the friends we once had don’t share the same values that we now have. We need to be “mutually encouraged by each other’s faith,” as it says in the following verses.

“For I long to see you so that I may impart some spiritual gift to you, that you may be strengthened; that is, to be mutually encouraged, while among you, by each other’s faith, both yours and mine.” Romans 1:11-12 LSB

In Acts 2, Peter preaches to a crowd and there are many who respond to his preaching and become Christians. 

“So then, those who had received his word were baptized; and that day there were added about three thousand souls. And they were continually devoting themselves to the apostles’ teaching and to the fellowship, to the breaking of bread and to the prayers.” Acts 2:41-42 LSB

Every one of these people needed to be mutually encouraged in their faith just as we do today. We can find four pillars of friendship in Acts 2:42. Let’s take a look at those pillars and see how we can apply them to our lives and friendships.

Pillar 1: Devoted to the apostles’ teaching. Are your friends devoted to going to church and to hearing the word of God preached? Do they spend time in Bible study? Do you get together and study God’s word? Do you compare notes about the previous Sunday’s teaching and encourage one another to think on godly things?

Being devoted goes beyond just showing up to sit through an hour of church, returning home, and forgetting about Biblical standards until the next Sunday. It means being involved in God’s word and His will for you every day. Finding friends who are also invested in their faith helps you to focus too.

Pillar 2: Fellowship with one another. Are you involved with people in your church or other Christians? Do you join in movie nights, or hikes, or other activities that build community? Do you help with outreach ministries?

Sometimes, putting yourself out there with new people is awkward. They may already have friends and you feel a little left out. Persevere. God wants you to have friendships among believers. Continue to participate in events sponsored by your church. Maybe you are the one encouraging someone else even when you don’t realize it.

Pillar 3: The breaking of bread. This one is pretty clear, right? Do you invite others to share a meal with you? Or, perhaps you can meet somewhere for coffee or tea. 

Jesus often ate with his disciples, friends, or the people he ministered to. This is something we can do too as we share a meal or coffee. There is something about sitting down to eat that encourage conversation.

 If you have trouble talking to people, make a list of questions to ask. Find a conversation starter and learn to relax and enjoy the time spent together. Sharing food or a coffee is a good way to get to know someone and that person may become a friend that you need, just as they need you.

Pillar 4: The prayers. Do you pray together with the person who is becoming your friend? This is different than praying for a person during your quiet time. Do you take the person’s hand and say, “Let’s pray,” lifting the concern to the Lord right then?

Praying together can make you more vulnerable and give you insights into your friend’s character and their needs. They will also learn about you. Prayer is a way to build compassion and empathy for the other person. Prayer requests are to be private and not shared with anyone else. You must be discreet about prayer requests, but it is amazing how meeting together in this way will strengthen your faith and your friend’s faith.

If we follow these four precepts, we will find friends to encourage our faith, inspiring us to be a better person and a better Christian. Don’t wait for someone to approach you with friendship. Pray about it, ask God to help you, and reach out to someone. 

And then do it again.