“Then [King David} was deeply moved, and went up to the chamber over the gate, and wept. And as he went, he said thus: “O my son Absalom—my son, my son Absalom—if only I had died in your place! O Absalom my son, my son!” 2 Samuel 18:33

What did David’s son, Absalom, do that caused David such great distress? If you recall, there were several events that led to this scene. Absalom killed his brother Amnon. He then committed treason against the King and tried to wrest the kingdom from him. He tried to kill King David, his father, and he slept with his father’s concubines in full view of the people. 

Yet, David mourned his son and wished he’d died in his place.

As a parent, when I read this lament of David’s for his son, Absalom, I can relate to that grief. I think most parents can. From the time our children are toddlers, they tend to have a streak of defiance, some more than others. Any parent who has faced a toddler stomping their foot or a teenager out past curfew understands the need to enact punishment while still loving that child.

We also know that David wasn’t showing favoritism to Absalom. In 2 Samuel 12:15-22, we can read the story of David’s first son by Bathsheba. Through the prophet, Nathan, God let David know his son would die. For days, David lay on the floor, fasting and pleading with God for his son’s life to no avail. David had a compassionate heart for his children.

As I read this story of Absalom, I was reminded of the story in Genesis chapter 7 when God shut Noah and his family in the ark and released the flood waters on the earth. I’ve often thought of Noah losing almost all his family, friends, and neighbors, and how hard that would be. But this time, I considered it from God’s point of view.

God lost almost all His creation. The people, the animals, all that He made was destroyed in the flood, except for those on the ark. Everything gone.

I picture God mourning like David did, weeping over the loss of those souls, even as He knew this was something that had to be done.

How can we be so sure God’s heart was broken? This is fairly easy to answer. The Bible has some clues. 

Psalm 86:15 says, “But You, O Lord, are a God full of compassion, and gracious, Longsuffering and abundant in mercy and truth.” He is a God of compassion. He doesn’t make rash judgements, but gives time for people to come to him.

1 John 4:8, “He who does not love does not know God, for God is love.” God is a God of extraordinary love. He loves us beyond what we can comprehend.

We can continue to look at the attributes of God: His grace, His mercy, His steadfastness… But, we can also see in Genesis how God felt after the flood. We see His broken heart even though mankind would always have wickedness in their heart—until that heart was replaced with a new one through Jesus.

After Noah left the ark, he built an altar and offered a sacrifice. The sweet smell of that sacrifice touched God’s heart.

“Then the Lord said in His heart, “I will never again curse the ground for man’s sake, although the imagination of man’s heart is evil from his youth; nor will I again destroy every living thing as I have done.” Genesis 8:21

Though our children may do things that hurt us, we must remember the great hurt God endured. Only through God’s love can any of us change and receive that new heart that makes us more like Him. We can take a lesson from God and from King David and become a parent who shows compassion. One who loves even when it’s hard.